I
watched when I went back from work (it's even hard for me to focus on my works
and I did not want to work late because I just had to watch this certain
series!), when I was going to sleep, and I even watched when taking a bath!
This last one was really not a good habit, this had caused me falling on my
butt and getting hospitalized .__. So, I have considered this
cannot-be-stopped-urge to continue watching as dangerous, literally.
On
top of that, by letting myself watch those non-added-value-fictional series, I
lost potential time to do something which actually promoted my growth, such as
reading articles or books, writing, exercising, and connecting with people. In
short, I invested my time wrongly/wrong, a lot of it.
After
quite some time (1.5 months probably?), I reached a point where I felt
"insecure" and uncomfortable with my own choice. I felt like the so
many varieties of Korean drama had been dragging me too long and too far from
things I should have been doing. I felt an intense feeling of guilt, and that
perfectly ruined the joy and excitement I used to feel from watching the series
and fangirling with handsome Korean actors. Why perfectly? It made me feel
guilty enough to promise myself to not start a new series, but not enough to
stop me watching the current series. It's a win-win then!
What's
important here is my realization of how bad the choice I made was and my
conscious effort to change. It sure would feel different if my mum or boyfriend
told me to stop watching. I would feel annoyed instead of “be awake”.
Today,
it's been more than a week since I stopped. I uninstalled Viu in my phone and I
stopped browsing for any Korean drama. My commitment makes me question myself a
thousand times whenever I feel like watching. I don't want to be trapped
further in a bad habit like that. I want my life to be filled with productive
and beneficial activities, leading me to who I want to become and what I want
to achieve. Watching Korean dramas is certainly not one of them.
What
do I do instead then? Amazingly, as soon as I "switched" the button
in my brain, it's much easier for me to purposely make better choices in my
life. I have been spending my free time by watching educational and
self-improvement videos. I installed Ted app in my phone and subscribed to
TED-Ed channel in YouTube, which eventually led me to find another great
channel like "FightMediocrity". Every night, I watch several videos
and try to reflect how in my life I can implement those things I learn. One
good example is the 5 Things Successful People Do Before 8 AM video by Terri
Savelle Foy, which I started to implement this week. You know what? It actually
feels really good to know that I am making good choices for myself. It's not
only a temporary feelings of joy but as I keep doing good stuffs, I can feel
the benefits every day and I look ahead with hope for even more benefits in my
future (I will discuss in more detail in a separate post). Now, I can proudly say that I have stopped and I have regained the control over my mind and time. Perhaps I will still watch some in the future, (as someone says, procrastination once in a while can be good for us) but not now and not in the near coming weeks. Moreover, it will be different as I will be fully aware of my choice and its consequences, hence I will be careful to stay in control.
So,
if I can, you also can stop your addiction or bad habits, replacing them by
good ones. It's your choice. After all, our today is the consequences of
yesterday's choices. Are you making the right choices now?
*Note: I just watched this video in YouTube and it superbly visualizes what I wrote in this post, check this out! :)
HOW TO BUILD YOUR SELF DISCIPLINE - NO EXCUSES BY BRIAN TRACY ANIMATED BOOK REVIEW
*Note: I just watched this video in YouTube and it superbly visualizes what I wrote in this post, check this out! :)
HOW TO BUILD YOUR SELF DISCIPLINE - NO EXCUSES BY BRIAN TRACY ANIMATED BOOK REVIEW
